Second hand Stress!!!????

I have always heard of second hand smoke but up until yesterday, I had never heard of second hand stress. I am still trying to figure it out. I understand if one person is stressed and the other isn't then there is no reason to stress out the one who isn't but the part I can't understand is "WHAT IS THE FIRST PERSON SUPPOSED TO DO????" am I just supposed to hold it in or is my only other option to let it out but to other people like on the message board or on here? What happened to the saying "communication is key to a relationship"? I always thought that was the rule but according to the councilor I guess I was wrong because it would be second hand stress if I vented or even acted stressed with my DF. I think that is bullshit and yes I said bullshit because it is my blog and I make the rules so therefor I can cuss if I want to, I can use punctuation or grammar mistakes if I want to or any other "general" rule I need to fuck up if it gets my feelings out lol.

My stress today comes from the fact that today is our Anniversary and instead of being able to spend it with my sweetie, I am forced to stay hidden for the day "Just in case" the bitch comes here after their meeting that the Army (well people in it) thought would be a great idea to have. So instead of us being able to cuddle and enjoy the day, I am stuck here hiding and he is meeting with the bitch. How freaking lovely. Happy freaking anniversary to me.
I wish all of this was done and over with but even though he just paid a lawyer allot of money, it could be up to 45 days or longer if she doesn't sign the DAMN paper. Why oh why did I ever think that Karma would be good to me if I was nice to my ex-husband? I WAS very nice and even turned down his car when the judge offered it to me, I thought well if I am nice now then later when I really need it, karma will be nice back and help me. BUT NOOOOOO karma gives me this super great and wonderful man who I plan on spending the rest of my life with but then gives me his big ass bitch of an ex to deal with. WTF karma? I need HELP not yet another obstacle to overcome in my pursuit of true and lasting happiness.
I finally found my happily ever after but before I can start it or enjoy it I have to fight the evil bitch lol.
That is another fucked up part about this situation, I can't say anything to her or even let my presence be known. I have to hide because of the stupid rule that would not apply in real life and just be there for him and I guess I am not allowed to be stressed or at least not allowed to show it because it would be second hand stress. Isn't that just a bitch????